Sorry if this article seems sort of disjointed. I’m writing it while I watch Mario Balotelli tear apart Germany in the EuroCup. I was also tempted to name this article “The Write Stuff” but we’re all adults, here, right? I don’t really have to pander to people with cheap wordplay like that, do I? Because I’ll do it if I have to! I just want you all to know that…
Anyway, while the last few months haven’t exactly been fruitful on the publishing front for me, I have been awarded a few rare opportunities to correspond with agents and read up on some wonderful blogs about query letters. Accordingly, I thought it might be interesting for me to weigh in on what I’ve learned about “personality” and how that can directly influence an aspiring writer’s success. In the relatively small amount of time I have spent exposed to the industry, I wanted to share with you some lessons I have learned.
Here’s a condescending picture of a kitten mocking you to explain how the publishing world feels about your complaints as a struggling writer.
The most important advice I could give anyone my age on how to maintain their personality is to be mercilessly upbeat and try to never break character. I know this can be a ridiculous challenge, but negativity works against us. The last thing you want to do is go on Twitter or Facebook or, worse, use your email to convey your negativity in a very public space. More people notice than you might think. Find a writing group in which to complain and share frustrations and always try to do so tactfully. Furthermore, every time you vent negativity, try to fill that void with something vaguely positive. That’s how we move forward. You should also never use your negativity against your own work. Never short-sell yourself as a writer and never speak ill of your own book. Let other people form their own opinions and never harass someone for giving you a negative review. I say, engage that reviewer and try to learn from the experience. The point is to learn how to keep your chin up.
Furthermore, learn how to conduct yourself with agents. The first time I met with an agent, I was told not to dive straight into my spiel about my book and instead to engage the agent first and ask her a few questions about her trip (she had come from New York to Kentucky). I smiled from start to finish, came prepared with all the materials I would need, and the agent even made a comment about how professional I was and how refreshing that was for her. Ultimately, no good may have come with regard to the project I was there to pitch, but she gave me the best advice I had heard from a publishing insider to date: I was doing everything right and would get there eventually. And I really think she meant it. At any rate, her final words to me were all the motivation I need to propel me through another year of writing and struggling my way towards success.
I’m sorry, that kitten picture from earlier was totally out of line. Here’s a sad looking dog wearing shoes that look like him to cheer you up.
I realize there are probably more profound things that aspiring writers want to hear from a commentary than “be positive” and “be upbeat”, but the fact is that there isn’t much more that you can do. If you’re not in good spirits, ask yourself why that is. Part of it might be that you don’t have 100% confidence in the project you’ve written and perhaps you need to ask yourself how you could be happier about it. If you need a confidence boost, have someone else read your book and give you an honest assessment. If their feedback is overwhelmingly positive, you’ll have a reason to feel positive, too. If they are critical of your work, LISTEN TO THEM, and ask yourself how to make your book better.
Okay, now onto something tangentially related that I saw on Twitter.
Now, I’m the last person who should be lecturing anyone. I’m very much a newb to the whole writing scene and I’m still trying to get my feet under me. That said, I did want to weigh in on something I saw online and see what other people thought. There was a hash tag trending on Twitter yesterday that read “Things Not To Say to a Writer” and, frankly, I found it more annoying that humorous. The first few tweets I read were amusing enough, but then the conversation spiraled into elitist attacks on people who like to read “Twilight”, or who ask writers where they get their ideas, or who ask writers how much money they make, or people who claim, “One day I’ll write a book…when I have the time.” Okay, some of these statements might be annoying to writers, but can’t we do better than passive-aggressively venting our frustration in Twitter?
I don’t write to show off my grammar skills. I don’t write to one-up Stephanie Meyers. And I certainly don’t write to put other people down, whether it’s other writers or readers. I write because I love doing it. The fact is that there are people in this world who love “Twilight”. So what? I don’t have to like those books, but it doesn’t mean I have anything against “Twi-hards”, even though they’re fun to joke about. Nothing annoys me more than a writer who derides fans of Meyers’ books and then goes home and watches crap like “Jersey Shore” or “Real Housewives” at night. Who are we to preach about taste?
We all have tastes and interests and morbid curiosities that we would just as soon keep to ourselves.
And here is a completely unrelated picture of a hedgehog getting a bath. Sorry, I’ve got a lot of stock cute animal photos on my computer that I’d like to use up.
So if a person who is completely ignorant about the writing process and all the hours of sweat and toil that we writers put into our projects comes up to me and asks me a stupid question, I’m not going to post on Twitter about how stupid that person is. I’m pretty sure my mechanic doesn’t post on Twitter every time I bring my car in and say, “I think it might be the, uh…reverse discharge combustion mobility brake-line…” even though he’s quite sure that I’m just babbling random words like an idiot. Instead, he just says “(Sigh) I’ll have a look at it and get back to you as soon as I can, Sir.”
When all is said and done, would you rather that people just stopped asking us questions about our projects? Would you rather that someone didn’t want to know how many books we’ve sold or how we came up with an idea or how we developed a character? I go around every day hoping someone WILL take an interest in my book, but maybe I’m just naïve. I would imagine that fans can sometimes be obnoxious, invasive, and ignorant, but the task falls on authors to learn how to cleverly evade those situations or turn them into something positive. There’s an old saying in Kentucky—actually, no one in Kentucky has ever said this before but I’m saying it for the first time now, so remember it—an assh*** is an assh*** regardless of how many books he has published.
Does it ever get old having people constantly ask us questions about our books? Sure it does! But that’s our cross to bear. Condescension on Twitter is never the answer, folks.
Jajaja…Spot on…I looked dothewritething.com last night and your cheap wordplay comment was perfect timing. Having been a free-lance publicist, one is reduced to doing cheap publicity at times, espesh in the electronica music industry.
I live in Cancun and the big stadium nearby has mega screens showing the Euro 2012. Gooool…the announcer screams and the crowd, of course, goes super wild. But the heat has peole fading.
Keep the advice coming as we are an Ex-pat community and we live on pins and needles, and walk on egg shells some days when we see masked men patrolling the streets or riding in the back of pickup police trucks. But then again, most folks say those are the real bad guys. Who knows but you will find not pearls of wispdom but rather chunking, hardliner views of the real Mexico in The Mexican Rose: House of Cartels Thrillogy…is that cheap wordplay or just cheap publicity?
Negativity always produces negativity. I’ve noticed a few times on face Book, people will say something like “If anyone out there is reading my posts, show me by cutting and pasting blah blah. It’s so whiney and then I feel negative as I scoot past the offending post. Oh no! Am I coming off negative and whiney by bringing that up? You just can’t win. Aarghh, did it again. See my point? Of course you do. Negativity produces negativity. On a positive note….(And you are quite right. Always end on a positive note) I thoroughly enjoy your Blog. Thanks, Lee
Negativity is fun but ultimately not productive. A critic has to like something before people take them seriously when they say they hate something.
Totally agree. Great blog by the way, very entertaining, especially the cute animals
First of all – cute hedgehog!!!!! I miss seeing hedgehogs around now. I am a kiwi buthave been living in Australia the past 5years.
I don’t like seeing anyone putting down other writer’s books, whether I think they are good or not. Twilight is a huge success, so Stephenie Meyer must have done something right! I ended up self publishing but in all honestly, would have preferred to be picked up by a major publisher. One comment made to me recently by a well thinking friend, kind of annoyed me – although I know it was not meant that way. She said when she had finished writing her book, she was going to get an agent – she wouldn’t self publish as she was too lazy. Gosh, now why didn’t I think of that?? Oh wait, I did. But after a few comments like: “I just don’t have time to read your book” or “I really like it, but I don’t think I am the right agent for you” – I kind of took a break from rejection
I never hear back from publishers. My writing isn’t easy to read — it’s not going to be easy to find a publisher that will support my writing.
Nice article, especially at the end. The first paragraph sounded a little SEO but I guess that’s the nature of the beast. You’re getting a lot more readers than me LOL!
What a great post. You are so right about being positive. Writers should never put down their own work, or that of other writers. It’s insulting to be told that a book you love is no good, and a real turn off to your potential readers.
Great post, Sean. Lots of insight and humour as usual.
I think it can take someone a while to make up their mind whether they like a writer, but that person is going to make up their mind much more quickly if the writer is rude or negative towards them. Nothing says ‘closing door’ like answering a genuine, well-meant question with condescension.
Sometimes it’s good to take a step back and think about a time when you’ve been on the receiving end of such treatment – and remember what a total nob you thought that person was!
I like the way in which you randomly put some pet pictures on the side. Still haven’t read the blog though, but will do, after I finished driving myself crazy by trying to understand Dutch tax law for entrepreneurs…
The bottom line, for me, when I see a book, a writer or a wannabe, is that we are doing what we love to do – not matter how it turns out in the end. Everyone has a story to tell/sell and they are entitled to pursue that end. It takes guts to put yourself and your ideas out there in such a public way – I have to agree with you here, to each their own. Thank you kindly for saying this.
So in regards to that second part, it’s basically just about good customer service…not punching them in the face, no matter how stupid they are and how many of them you’ve dealt with today. Although frankly, I think it’d be kind of flattering to be asked how you came up with a character – I mean, presumably people wouldn’t ask if your character was boring or stupid. (I never quite know what to say when they ask the very general “What is your book about?” when they first find out you’re writing a book…partly because I’m like, well, how much detail do they actually want? But I’m taking it as an opportunity to practice elevator-pitching, more or less.)
Yeah, hate to admit it (being extremely negative by nature) but I think social media is not the place for doom and gloom. What might sound sardonic and quirky when spoken out loud tends not to translate well to the world of Facebook and even Twitter. People want some light relief. Like a photo of a soap-sudded baby hedgehog.
Fact. I’ve posted so many things on Twitter that I deleted 20 seconds later because I thought, “Wait, what if nobody gets that I’m being ironic” or “What if my clever political joke is taken as a serious attack on someone’s party and I suddenly lose all of my left or right-leaning followers”. I try to just keep everything focused on my writing and fight every temptation to remark on politics, religion, etc. I think the best advice I can give on Twitter is that if you wouldn’t say it at a crowded Victorian-England dinner party, don’t say it at all.
Great blog. Love the hedgehog. That agent was right. You WILL get there. It took me a while, too. It took more time and energy to find the right editor and agent than to find a guy to marry! I still write for the love of it rather than anything else. That hasn’t changed.
I’ve been enjoying your blog, but then noticed today that you’ve unfriended me on Twitter without provocation. I’ll use your line of questioning here: Would you rather people stop reading your blog? Thanks for the encouragement.